Year 2, Day 76: 1 Corinthians 7

More Sex

Sex, sex, sex.  You would think that by reading Paul’s letters to the Corinthians that Paul was actually writing to a modern church in the western world.  This point has already been brought out in the great conversations in the comment sections over the last few days – but it is worth bringing out again.  Sometimes reading 1 & 2 Corinthians is good because it speaks so much to the issues in the western church (and culture).  But sometimes reading these books is difficult because the message of these books hit so very close to home.

Clearly the Corinthian church is having some internal struggles about the issue of sex.  Of course, we as Americans in our modern culture have the same issue!  Let’s look deeply into Paul’s advice to the Corinthians.

• In an ideal world, people would abstain from sexual relations.  Paul says it, it is true, and it must be acknowledged.  In a perfect world, it is good for sex to never enter into the picture.  If the Christian is genuinely focused on doing God’s will, sex would not even make the priority list.  Don’t get me wrong.  I’m in no way saying all sex is sin.  It’s not.  Consensual sex within marriage is in no way a sinful act.  It is just that when one becomes married one is innately split away from a unilateral focus.  Even when the spouse is genuinely faithful to God there is still a divided set of priorities.
• However, we do not live in an ideal world.  Sex does enter into our mind.  Sex is a part of the picture.  If we are a person who cannot control our physical urges, we should get married simply to avoid the threat of sexual temptation.  For the record, notice that Paul speaks to both sides.  Paul knows that both women and men have urges.  Thus, each woman in this case should have a husband and each man in this case should have a wife.
• Furthermore, sex is not a weapon within the marriage.  In fact, consensual sex should actually be seen as relief.  If a person is struggling to keep his or her physical urges under control, allowing relief of those urges to happen should be part of the agenda for the spouse {assuming the request is reasonable, of course}.  At the very least, spouses should be concerned for each other’s physical needs – or ability to keep their physical urges under control.

I hate to speak about sex in such a clinical manner.  There are great books in the Bible that speak much more relationally and much more lovingly about sex and marriage.  But this is not one of them.  I think we should pay attention to the possible reason that Paul speaks no plainly and so clinically about sex to the Corinthians: they struggle in this area.  When we are in a time of temptation, that is the right time to talk about things clinically and matter-of-factly.

Think about it.  If a person has struggles with an eating disorder, do I talk about how great food tastes?  If a person has an alcoholism disorder, do I talk about the medicinal benefits of consuming small doses of wine?  If a person has issues within stealing, do I talk about all the great material things that I have in my life?  No.  When people struggle, we talk clinically about the issue so as to address the problem in such a way that does not inspire further offense or compulsion.

In America, I’m not sure the problem of “sex addiction” is solved by talking about the sweetness of the marriage union as found in a book like Song of Solomon.  No, I believe the answer to the problem rests in understanding the clinical purpose of sex and understanding the potential problems that sex can introduce into our ability to fulfill our calling from God.  I wish I could talk flowingly about the love that I have for my wife {and I do!} … but I’m not sure that doing so will actually constructively help to address the sex problem that America has.  In the same light, I’m not convinced it is wrong either.  I’m just saying that I think talking about the love in my marriage is best saved for after the problem has been resolved and the offending persons can genuinely appreciate the sentiment without being drawn into temptation.

Faithfulness

Paul then talks about a great piece of advice: remain faithful in the position that you are in.  It is possible for a married person to read these verses and realize that their loyalties are actually divided between God and their spouse.  So should they pursue divorce so as to be solely devoted to the Lord?  No!  One does not draw closer to God by doing that which God does not desire.  It is also possible that a person who was divorced and remarried before becoming a Christian reads God’s Word and wonders if they should divorce their second spouse in order to refrain from committing adultery.  Again, I think Paul would tell us that the answer is no.  We cannot always correct our sinful errors before we become the Lord’s.  The only thing that we can genuinely control is what we do once we become the Lord’s.  In this case, stay faithful to the new spouse and demonstrate the love of God to the person.

The key in most of what Paul says in this chapter is the pursuit of God’s will.  If you are single and can refrain from sexual temptation, pursue God with all your heart and you will be satisfied.  If you cannot refrain from sexual sin, then become married – but do not let your marriage inhibit you from pursuing God with all of your heart.  If you sinned in the past, repent of it and pursue God to the best of your circumstance now that you are His.    If we pursue God’s will and God’s ways rather than pursuing the desires of our heart, we will never go wrong.

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